MaujGaadi – the beautiful journey of life™ !!!!!

all about social happiness

“POOR BOYS!” September 22, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 5:41 am

When a Girl Cries ————The World “Consoles” her


But when a boy cries ———- They say Come on man

don’t be A “Girl”

If A Girl slaps a Boy ———– Definitely the Boy would have “done something”

If Boy Slaps a girl ———— — Rascal doesn’t know how to “Respect Ladies”

If a Girl is talking to Boys

—– She is “Very Friendly”

If a Boy talks to a Girl

———- He is “flirting”

If a Girl meets with accident ———— ——–

Then its “mistake of others”

If a Boy meets with same accident ———–? – –?——

“Don’t you know how to Drive”

What A World Is this

Please help us God..

 

Guru Gyan…!!! September 21, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 3:29 pm

guru

Never drink while driving.You could spill your beer.

Some bosses are like clouds: the minute they disappear,the day suddenly gets brighter.

To err is human,to blame someone for your problem is strategic.

Your future depends on your dreams.Dont waste time and Go to bed NOW!!

 

BOSS KIDNAPPED….. September 18, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 1:24 pm

BOSS KIDNAPPED” WHAT TO DO?

Employees of a Company are all worried. Some are roaming around. Some are in
loud discussions during office time…..

Some Trainees, who had just joined, notice this and enquire about what happened
to a senior employee, they ask, “What’s going on?”

“Terrorists have kidnapped our Boss”

They’re asking for Rs.10 Crores (2 MILLIOn US $) ransom, otherwise they’re going to
douse him with petrol and set him on fire.

We’re going from desk to desk, taking up a collection.”

One Trainee asks, “How much is everyone giving, on average?

.
.

“About 1 liter.”

 

WOMEN = Problems — proved mathematically !!! toooo gud lol September 17, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 2:38 pm

 

News reporter…. September 15, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 4:35 pm

A man sees a woman getting chased by a dog in chandni chowk area of New
Delhi.

When the dog is about to bite the woman, the man intervenes and kicks the
dog.

A Times of India reporter was seeing all this.

He said”That was great.

I’ll definitely publish this in our newspaper.

Tomorrow the headline will be ‘LOCAL HERO SAVES LADY FROM A DOG’.”

The man replied “Thank you, but I’m not from here. I am from US”.

Reporter said ” OK. Then the headline will be US CITIZEN SAVES WOMAN FROM A
DOG”.

Man: Actually, I live in US but I’m not a US citizen.

I’m a Pakistani national by origin”.

Next day, the headline in the paper read

….

….

….

….

Pakistani Terrorist ATTACKS A LOCAL DOG.

 

Same service!!!

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 5:28 am

A Husband Visited a marriage counselor and said,

“When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking. Now after ten years it`s all different. I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking.”
“Why complain?” said the counselor, “You re still getting the same service!”

 

INDIAN WAY… September 14, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 2:18 pm

Indian way of doing Business

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in

Washington D.C. One from Bangladesh , another from India and the third, from China .

They go with a White House office to examine the fence.

The Bangladesh contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring,

then works some figures with a pencil. “Well”, he says, “I figure the job will run about $900. ($400 for materials, $400 for my team and $100 profit for me)”.

The Chinese contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, “I can do this job for $700. ($300 for materials, $300 for my team and $100 profit for me)”.

The Indian contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, “$2,700.”

The official, incredulous, says, “You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?”

The Indian contractor whispers back, “$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we

hire the guy from China to fix the fence.”

“Done!” replies the government official.

 

Chor ka vishvaas…!!

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 2:03 pm

Ek Chor ghar me chori karne Gaya,
tijori par likha tha

” TIJORI KO TODNE KI JARURAT NAHI,
452 No. LAGAO AUR SAMNE WALA LAAL BUTTON DABAO,
TIJORI KHUL JAYEGI ”

Jaise hi button dabaya alarm baja aur police aayi.

Jate waqt chor seth se bola



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“AAJ  MERA  INSANIYAT   SE  VISHWAS UTH  GAYA “!!!!

 

IF U LOVE SOME ONE…

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 8:54 am

If you love someone,
Set her free…
If she comes back, she’s yours,
If she doesn’t, she never was…
.

**********

THE NEW VERSIONS…. .

**********

Pessimist:

If you love someone,
Set her free ………… …..
If she ever comes back, she’s yours,
If she doesn’t, as expected, she never was

**********

Optimist:

If you love someone,
Set her free ………… …..
Don’t worry, she will come back.

**********

Suspicious:

If you love someone,
Set her free ………… …..
If she ever comes back, ask her why.

**********

Playful:

If you love someone,
Set her free ………… …..
*If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her
free again, repeat *

**********

Bill Gates :

If you love someone,
Set her free,
If she comes back,
I think we can charge her for re-installation fees but
tell her that she’s also going to get an upgrade.

**********

Finance expert :

If you love someone
set her free
If she comes back, its time to look for fresh loans
If she doesn’t, write her off as an asset gone bad.

**********

 

Blind man inTexas!!! September 13, 2009

Filed under: Funny Jokes — mauj-team @ 2:21 pm

There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, “Wow, these seats are big!” The person next to him answered, “Everything is big in Texas.”When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, “Wow these mugs are big!” The bartender replied, “Everything is big in Texas.”

After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, “Second door to the right.” The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.

Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, “Don’t flush, don’t flush!”

laugh


There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, “Wow, these seats are big!” The person next to him answered, “Everything is big in Texas.”

When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, “Wow these mugs are big!” The bartender replied, “Everything is big in Texas.”

After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, “Second door to the right.” The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.

Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, “Don’t flush, don’t flush!”